There's been something brewing and burning in my heart for a few days now. I'm not sure how, why, who or what this is for, but I believe that this is an appropriate channel for expression. So here it goes. This is concerning anyone who believes themselves to be disciples of Jesus Christ. I hear and see often that reading the Bible is a chore, that its difficult, and that its boring and irrelevant. I've experienced it myself. Why? The answer is so simple. It becomes boring and irrelevant for one simple reason: the person reading does not believe what they're reading. They don't believe it. They don't. They might mentally acknowledge it, but they don't believe it. I remember spending years in Sunday school and in church being BORED out of my mind. Loathing Sundays because I didn't want to hear this stuff. Why? It was irrelevant, seemed to not make any sort of difference in anyone's life at all, and was more or less an academic pursuit. Of which I truly believe is a vile vile thing. The things of God "taught" by the methods of school? School, the bane and burden of my existence? I cannot think of a better way to repel people. Theoretical mind games - no relevance to life. Does that mean we are not to use our minds? Of course not, God has given them to us for his purposes and his glory. But seeking the kingdom and truths of God as an exercise of the mind only is an absolute perversion. Hello, the only people who did that IN the Bible were the experts of the law, the scribes, and the pharisees. The kingdom of God belongs to those who would receive it like children. Who hear from God with simplicity - nothing complex, nothing hard to grasp - just a desperate need for a savior. Simple, beautiful truths that permeate all of life - not just some sick sort of classroom understanding. God literally SCARED me into believing. After being anesthesized into a drooling blind stupor by my church experience for years and years, suddenly and forcefully, God exposed me to the spiritual realities of the world. An unseen spiritual realm that is closely intertwined with the natural physical world. Demons, angels, spirits, powers, and principalities. Suddenly, all of which I had seen in the Word but never perceived struck fear into the deepest parts of my heart. Fear of reality. "Oh my God, it's all real!" Suddenly, I didn't care about WHAT anybody had told me I was supposed to know or think about God. It was apparent to me that they could quite obviously be wrong and not know what in the world they were talking about. When it comes to absolute truth, the nature of the game is that there's gonna be a LOT of people on this planet who will be very surprised that they were wrong when all is said and done. I understood that I am not exempt from that possibility, nor the people who had tried to teach me. I began to read the word in a simple way, tabula rosa - blank slate, leaving all my assumptions, all my prior head knowledge at the door. I read to see exactly what Jesus said. I read to see if what Paul said matched with what Jesus said. I was grieved and confused when I ran upon what seemed to be inconsistencies in the spirit of the message. I was SCARED and FEARFUL at the warnings of Jesus - those why cry, "Lord, Lord!" and Jesus would respond, "away from me you evildoers, I never knew you." Could that be me? Oh I think so and it scared me to the utmost! I was blessed and comforted by the thief who was promised to be in paradise with Jesus - at absolutely no merit of his own, only by the mercy of our Lord. I was amazed, curious, skeptical at the miracles and about the claims that Jesus made. This guy REALLY claimed to be GOD! Maybe he's just a guy who has a serious problem with humility and reality? I had stumbled upon a crisis of reality and it was decision time. It's true or its utterly bogus and bunk. But the last thing the Bible was was boring. It scared me to the depths of my soul. My church doctrine couldn't save me, nor did I want it to - only pleading with the savior for life could. It literally put me on my knees - tears, fears, doubts - and humbled me before God. It made me ask questions. "Whoever comes to me will never be thirsty again." Lord, WTF? What about me? Why isn't this true in my life? It comforted and healed me to see the character of our Lord and our God. Conceptions of a God who was impossible to please were both confirmed and destroyed. Confirmed in my flesh. Utterly destroyed by trusting in the saving power of the cross. Today, Christians are utterly CRIPPLED for the simplest reason. We don't believe the Bible. "Without faith it is impossible to please God." "Ask and you shall receive." "You do not have because you do not ask." "Blessed are those who mourn." "Is anyone of you sick? Confess your sins to one another. Have an elder anoint you with oil and pray for you and you will be healed." "Come to me all who are weary, and I will give you rest." "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything with prayer and petition, present your requests to God, and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus." "You do not belong to yourselves, because you have been brought at a price." "Bless those who curse you... Love your enemies... If anyone asks for your coat, give him your tunic as well..." "Do not worry about tomorrow." What are these?? Fanciful theories? Suggestions? No. Trust in God and in his word, and the kingdom is ushered in forcefully and violently and things begin to change all around us- first in the spiritual realm, then in the natural realm. The sick are healed, the blind see, the captives are set free, the love of God begins to flow. First in us, then those around us. True freedom from anxiety, from the pressures of life. Of utmost relevance to every last person on this planet. By the way, don't get me wrong. The church is the body of Christ, ordained by God and absolutely necessary to the life of a Christian. Much of what I write is from a rapid change of perspective - from death to life - an immature view, I'm sure, and I've not been able to disassociate and clear up my past. But there is also a lot that is wrong with what we believe today in America and that is confirmed to be evident by the life of your average Christian. Also, some groups of believers are in better shape than others. I'm only sharing my experiences. I'm not going to hold back for the sake of politeness - I believe the truth carries much further than political correctness. If I make a dire mistake with my harsh words, Lord I ask you to forgive me and teach me, and reader, I ask you to forgive me as well and to pray for me. But hear the spirit of what I'm saying if you can, please.